The Police Officer
Okaloosa County, Walton County
God Made Police Officers...
the Lord was creating police officers, he was into his sixth day of working
overtime when an angel appeared and said, "You sure are doing a lot of
fiddling around on this one."
And the Lord said, "Have you read the specs on this order? A police officer has to be able to run five miles through alleys in the dark, scale walls, enter homes the health inspector wouldn't touch, and not wrinkle his uniform.
has to be able to sit in an undercover car all day on a stakeout, cover a
homicide scene that night, canvass the neighborhood for witnesses, and testify
in court the next day.
has to be in top physical condition at all times, running on black coffee and
half-eaten meals. And he has to have six pairs of hands."
angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands ... no way."
not the hands that are causing me problems,” said the Lord, "it's the
three pairs of eyes an officer has to have."
on the standard model?" asked the angel.
Lord nodded. One pair that sees through a bulge in a pocket before he asks,
"May I see what's in there, sir?" (When he already knows and wishes
he'd taken that accounting job.)
pair here in the side of his head for his partners' safety.
another pair of eyes here in front that can look reassuringly at a bleeding
victim and say,’ You’ll be all right ma'am, when he knows it isn't so."
said the angel, touching his sleeve, " Why don't you rest and work on this
can't," said the Lord, "I already have a model that can talk a 250
pound drunk into a patrol car without incident and feed a family of five on a
civil service paycheck."
angel circled the model of the police officer very slowly, "Can it
think?" she asked. "You bet," said the Lord. "It can tell
you the elements of a hundred crimes; recite Miranda warnings in its sleep;
detain, investigate, search, and arrest a gang member on the street in less time
than it takes five learned judges to debate the legality of the stop ... and
still it keeps its sense of humor.
officer also has phenomenal personal control. He can deal with crime scenes
painted in hell, coax a confession from a child abuser, comfort a murder
victim's family, and then read in the daily paper how law enforcement isn't
sensitive to the rights of criminal suspects."
the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the police officer.
"There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were
trying to put too much into this model."
not a leak," said the lord, "it's a tear."
the tear for?" asked the angel.
for bottled-up emotions, for fallen comrades, for commitment to that funny piece
of cloth called the American flag, for justice."
a genius!" said the angel.
Lord looked somberly at the angel and said. "I'm no genius; I did not put
the tear in his eye!"